Great...

Great...School's reopened...and I'm not happy with it... *GRRR*

Why?

Why does the school have to reopen on the last week of december?? I just feel so redundant about this...might as well reopen on the 5th of Jan next year, at least we can have a little more time to rest...Arrgh...I hate it...

Duh...anyway, I'll just blog about sunday.

Hmm, sunday, Yong Hui did a faith allocation, and well, most of it are approved by 'upstairs', even though he was being breathed fire upon, and thank God, my East are filled in the end!! Hallelujah!! Haha, well, thanks Boon Xiong, Huiling and Abby for giving me tips...haha, and the ushers that served East with me!! Haha..Man...I was so nervous that day, afraid that I'd make a mistake or whatever...phew!!

After that, some of us went to Marina Square to eat and fellowship, think is to eat with Jasmine though...Haha...

Well, gotta sleep now, I can't wait for the countdown with the clique!! And cg thanksgiving!! And jamming with Greg after thanksgiving!!! O.O Wow...I've become superman...LOL...

Faith!!

Gerald sure had a very 'fun' time on his birthday...Haha...

Cake on the face, scrubbed around your face, somemore it's by his own sister!! Haha, and then being pushed down into the water a few times, and being grabbed by the legs and hands and aim the middle to the tree...wow...Haha, I don't think I want to tell anyone about my 21st birthday already...Haha...

Well, basically didn't do anything much on boxing day...slacking at home, till at night Joshua told me something, I'm allocated as East IC this sunday...OMG...It's my first time doing it...I'm like so excited...just don't screw anything up and I'm happy with it.

Until an hour plus ago, Boon Xiong called me and told me it's confirmed, and he taught and reminded me the stuffs as a IC need to know, and he ask me to do a new section in usher. Well, thanks Boon Xiong!

I guess, my time is here. Haha, got to pray even harder and more to see it...by faith!!!

Merry Christmas!!

Firstly, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!! HAHA!!

Haha, went for first service, and served for the second one. The drama is super funny!!! The funny part to me I think is that part where the angel Benny appeared infront of the shepherds using profound English vocabulary, and the cute part I think is the talking sheep. Haha.

After serving went to Ben's house, went to eat dinner with him, Chong and ben's cousin...Haha...bah chor mee and roti prata...haha, full dinner, then went back to his house to play guitar and then play fifa 09. LOL. That's how I spent my Christmas...I'm just joking...Haha...

At his house played a song called 'not alone' by Mcfly. Speaking about alone, guess I just seriously hate loneliness, whenever you see me alone, you will always see me in a moody face, but when I'm around with someone, be it only one person, I'm always hyped-out to the max!! Haha...

Anyway, both sides thanksgiving were postponed. Thank God!! Initially both clashed, and now both postponed to different dates...phew!!

Well, was thinking of doing something like what I did last year, typing out what I feel about everyone in the cg...haha....

Xiu Wen -- Need I say more?? She's my cgl!!! Woohoo!!! K-BOX!!!

Huiling -- Banana!!! PCGL, always cheerful!!

Wei Siong -- Closest to in the cg. My cgc, the one that always crap/joke/laugh/whatever with me...Haha...

Jarrett -- From last time cute to now cool...LOL...mature and mature...

Wen Shun -- Loves to sing, mature thinking, fun to be around with.

Kenny -- The coolest guy in the cg, look good, mature and is creative. Haha.

Kathryn -- A good listening ear, a fun sister to be around with. =)

Mabelngiangology -- Well, I have to put this long name, if not I'm sure going to get it from her...can sing also...purpleholic...

Rachel/Rachelle/Zhou Tai -- Guess she's too obsessed with other names...LOL...sings too.

Yu Kang -- The siao siao and random one...LOL...

Wei Kiat -- Just came and join us not long ago, but definitely someone fun to be around with...haha.

Ken(Tiong/Potong) -- The nickname Tiong is thought out by Xiu Wen, Potong's by me...haha. Feels as if he's a photocopy of Jarrett...Haha.

Hao Rong -- I didn't really get to talk to him much...arrghh...

Agnes -- TV TV TV TV TV TV TV SMS SMS SMS SMS SMS SMS SMS SMS LOL

May -- Always generous, fun to be around with also. Haha.

Gary -- What more can I say, in choir, going to bv...loves to sing of course, although he keeps denying...LOL

Louie -- When are you going to slim down??

Hui Tong -- Sigh...Speechless...LOL...Sotong!! Joking Joking...

Nicholas -- Come back.......

Well, that's all I can think for now...if I do miss out anything, please tell me...

Well, tomorrow serving, then go for Gerald's birthday at chalet...

Bye.

Tired...

Well, I'm supposed to be sleeping, but here I am blogging...Haha...

Anyway just decided to blog the whole thing out...haha, because I think we had a fun time fellowshipping...haha.

Wen Shun, Kenny, Wei Siong, Mabel, Kathryn and me went to a park near Kat's house to like sit down and chit chat. Jarrett also came and join us in between...haha.

Well, it's sort of quite good though, as Wen Shun and I shared our personal testimonies and experiences to Mabel...Haha, I hope it really encourages her. Haha.

I even had another revelation just now. Haha. I'm back!!! lol...

Had a fun time with them, and first time we sat on a car drove around by...........Kenny!!!!

We went to eat supper and then came back to the same place to slack again...by 4 plus, everybody were like 3/4 dead...sigh...I'm still like quite awake...

Kenny then drove Wen Shun, Wei Siong and me to the BL MRT station, and we waited for the first train to come. I always took the last train, but I never took first train before...lol. There were like so many rats there at the bicycle area...omg...

Anyway, don't think I'm sleeping already, because I'll be accompanying my mum to buy my younger brother's books, her stuffs, and celebrate my brother's birthday...Think I'll rest more on Tuesday...

A tempory one...

Well, finally I can blog now...not sure for how long, but, at least I can blog...Haha...

Well, I just stuff what happened last week to this week..Haha.

Planned to do something for Si Jia during her last duty at JW, we met up on Monday to plan and practice. Imagine you playing guitar and singing at the top floor of a...hmm, should I call that a shopping centre...haha...I don't know...LOL

Sunday we performed at the church cafe after service, and I sprained my ankle...ouch!

Anyway, last week was quite 'busy', been going for meetings and stuff...Haha, and had fun fellowshipping with my cg members...Haha.

This week is the second week of my holidays...I want to make the most out of it!

Anyway, I seriously seriously need to pick myself up...I don't know what and why that makes me turn like this, but if you see something wrong about me, please come up to me and tell me, but don't scold me...I don't wish to be like that also...

Anyway, I believe this week will be a good week!!

I want to change!!!

Today went to the meeting with Pst CK.

It's really a great message! I really want to change for the better...really got to be desperate for the things that I want, especially if I really want to rise up, be it in cg or usher. Got to be desperate for it. Arrgh... I really want to change!!

Anyway, really thank God, haha...Thank God that I still have $10 inside my bank, so just now I still can have my dinner...Haha...

Well, this week shall try my best for my new position!!

Monday...

Today was supposed to meet Gerald and Abigail in the afternoon to study...but guess everyone's too tired...plus the weather is raining...such good time to sleep...AHAHAHA...

Well, still met up anyway, but can't reveal first...haha...Had fun fellowshipping with each other, Boon Xiong, Joshua Tham, Bernard, Gregory and Hui Ping came down also. Of course, Ben and Chong came down, as Ben and I had some more stuffs to do...Haha.

After everything, excluding Hui Ping as she went back first, we went to starbucks to chill and chat about some ushers stuffs...Hmm...

I'm full of question marks and exclamation marks around my head when I leave that place...LOL...

Well, guess it's time to rise up!!

What a day!

Guess I'm super tired now...haha. Served for communion, then went to join cg for fellowship.


CG went to eat steamboat at bugis. =) It's a good fellowship!! Haha, had lots of laughter around, and we even went to the roof area at Esplanade to slack and chill. Glad that Nicholas came, so long never see him already, hope he can come back and join us...Anyway, I want to thank God for blessing!! Haha...a cup of water! Well, although you all may think, 'Huh?! Only a cup of water what...' Well, let me tell you, it came on time! Because we were eating steamboat, I'm already broke...so no money to buy water, so I didn't ordered mine when Xiu Wen asked...but she bought me one!! So thankful!!


I'm kind of shocked when I alighted the train at JE and trying to take the red line train.


I saw Gerald and the rest.


LOL...such coincidence la!! Haha...Was very tired when I reached home...Haha...

It's Over!!!

Finally...9 weeks of torment is finally over!! Wahahaha...

LOL...my exams are over...I'll just plan to use this 3 weeks wisely...

Usher Outing.

Went to have a dinner and have some fun with Benjamin Chan, since he's going for his NS soon. Haha, really had lots of fun.

Group 16 ushers, really is a group of fun and crazy people...HAHA...I mean, they really are fun and crazy people...haha.

Thinking back, I used to think usher ministry is a boring ministry, lots of committment, asking for seats always, but ever since I stepped into this ministry, indeed, it's a different experience. Furthermore, thinking back of all the people that I can clique with very well now, or let's say can talk crap at almost anytime. Ren Shen, Abigail, Joshua Tham, Gerald. These people are really the ones that I can hang round with all the time. Haha. Man, I like the playing and crapping times...haha.

Anyway, Ben, all the best!! Haha, when you get out, share with us your experiences inside!! HAHA.

Ok, I go study already...

Mug...Mug...Mug...

Hmm, yesterday, spent every single cent in my wallet...and I meant every single cent!!!

Haha...spent my money on train concession, on lunch, gave tithe and building fund, but, God is indeed good. I still got some money to buy beancurd while accompanying Wei Siong have his dinner. Thank God had a little food at Jarrett's house, treated by Jarrett's parents, and when I reached home, has some sushis...haha.

Anyway, gotta work hard for upcoming tests...

Mug...Mug...Mug...Mug...Lol...

ASIA CONFERENCE!!!!!!!

WAHHHH...Finally it's over...it's fun and interesting and exciting, life-changing, overwhelming, and just...WOW!!!

Served as usher for 3 days, and indeed, I learnt a lot!!! Haha. Especially during the times where we were guarding the barricades to flow the people in batch by batch, and also being a runner for the first time for Jason Ng!!! Haha. We also had fun while giving out water, and fellowshipping around the hall and stuff. Not forgetting the 2 bros that have accompanied me throughout the whole serving journey! Benjamin Chan and Ren Shen!! Haha, thanks guys!!

I still can't believe it that the 5 days ended so fast. It's just like an blink of an eye, from the registration, to the lunch, to the electives, the night sessions, the morning sessions, the drama, the finale. Everything, just 'Boom', and it's all gone. But, I believe that many foreign delegates and local delegates went back with a big bang in their lives too, because all the messages were just so life changing!!!

Can you imagine, Pastor Phil, Dr. A.R. Bernard, Pastor Ulf Ekman, Pastor Benny Hinn, and our beloved Pastor, Pastor Kong!!!! All in one conference, this is the biggest christian conference ever to be held in Asia. Now it's over! Well, it's sad, but fun!! Woohoo..

Managed to take photos some photos.

Photos in order: With David Yem, with Sidney Mohede, with Pastor Abraham Ku from Taipei New Life Church!!


Anyway, to include, there's performances from renowned P&W band, and celebrities. Performances from Christian City Church Band from Australia, Don Moen from USA, Carola from Sweden, Sidney Mohede and True Worshippers from Indonesia, Liu Geng Hong from Taiwan, JJ Lin and Jack Neo from Singapore, and of course, our very own CHC band!!!

Anyway, it's tiring though, reaching home at around 12 plus to 1, still got to juggle between school and have to rush down after that, and during sunday have to report super early. Kudos to those who served all 5 days and those drenching themselves during the rainy days.


Hmm, to comment, Heart Of God ushers, they deserve praises also. Especially during the last night, Ren Shen and I saw something which really think they are really good. This conference is organized by our church, Hall 8 belongs to us, instead of all the CHC ushers helping to clear up(other than those who are really in need of going home early), we saw the HOG ushers actually helping out...I'm like OMG...


Hmm..hope I didn't missed out anything...Anyway, really had fun serving with Group 16 ushers. Haha, especially Gerald, Ren Shen, Benjamin Chan, Gregory, Jason Ng, Ivory, Huiling, Abigail, Joshua Ong, Joshua Tham, Jasmine, the other Benjamin(but I don't know his surname...), I don't know a boy's name, I think he's 12 years old...haha...If I missed out anyone...please don't blame me...I can't remember so many at once!!


It was such great fun, despite of dealing with all the "weird" congregations and their "emotions", it's because of these incidents, that made us ushers have greater capacity, and bond even stronger!! Haha... Helping each other to solve problems that we faced and also sudden situations, also standing up for them when they can't solve the problem alone. Anyway, it's just great fun to be in usher!! Haha. Although I can't be with the cg in more days, but fellowshipping with the ushers and really bonding with them is really worth it!! Haha..

I'll blog again soon...LOL

What's Wrong With Me???!!!

I don't know what's the thing that's going wrong in my life...

hmm, how to get out of this and find back the real me...

hmm, I don't know...

Finally...

Yes...finally, I can access internet in my campus...but it's not the school's internet, but I just accessed the wireless@sg, no choice, but this is the only way I can access internet... Thank God that this time round I'm able to log on to the internet, don't know how long it'll last, but I'll just make use of it as much as possible...

Well, things are just getting worse for me...I don't know why...a moment I'm happy, but a while later I'll be like at the bottom of my life...don't understand, and I'm seriously tired...maybe this is what I have to go through during the A&B season...but, it's really tiring...I feel as if I can collapse anytime...

Went for CIP yesterday, and thank God! I'm able to make it on time for the sermon. Whew! Spent the rest of the day at cafe teaching Joshua a bit of guitar, even though I'm not that good myself), but I just teach whatever I know...haha...

I then went to Bugis to look for my mum, and I guess I was really tired on that day...

This morning...sigh...why do I always let the spirit of weariness and depression have a grip on my life??!! AHHHHHHHHH

Phi 4:13 -- "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

Guess this will be the verse to pull me up...

I'll reply the tags here...

Abby: Hihi!!

Dayana: HELLLOOO!! Haha, how are you?

Darren: What you talking???

James: Yo!! Haha.

Abigail: Haha, I've linked you long ago, just that I don't really know how to use your tagboard, so I can't leave a msg...haha, I'm so noob...LOL

JiaJun: Haha, thanks for the encouragement bro, think you rarely see me feel so down...I'm known to laugh alot, so don't worry, I'll pick myself up!!!!

mabelngiangology: HAHA...you found me...lol, I'll link you up. Cya!

Well, guess that's all, think I'll update soon...

AHHHHHHHHHH

Just doing a short post...I know I've not been updating my blog, half of it is the internet problem, I can't connect to internet both in school and at home!!!!!!

In school I can't connect is because I didn't pay my school fees...sigh...please pray for me though...

Anyway, I'm updating this at Riverwalk!! Can you believe it?! LOL...

Well, a lot of things happened during the two months that I didn't update...

October, F1 event, went out with JJ to shop after he got his pay, went out with Jia Jun to get his new set of clothes, hanging out with Cheryl, Tina, Sheng Hong, Torrance, Leon and Schumann(hope I didn't spell wrongly...) after service, went to K-Box with them during one of the sundays...

Started school already, but I feel so depressed, anyway, never pay money, means can't use school systems. Seriously, I think this kind of poly rule will kill a lot of people, I know that they use this to ensure people pay the school fees, but what if some can't? They didn't even think of such factors, all they say is "We'll help you apply for this, apply for that..." When they apply, things take so slow, but when they take money from us, it's just as quick as lightning...MONEY SUCKERS...crap...lol

Anyway, now is Arise and Build season, a lot of problems in my family...please pray for me if you can...appreciate it... :)

Well, I'll stop here...can't wait for the ASIA CONFERENCE!!!! (I'll have to study...sigh...)

Sum up...

Ok, before I say anything...WHY MY BLOG SEEMS SO DEAD??? lol. Just some random acts...

Duh..

Last Sunday's message by Pst Kong was so so so good!! He's the man...woohoo...

Ok, anyway, last Friday and on this week's Monday went to gym with JJ, and Friday with Wei Siong and Monday with Kenny(Not W143 Kenny...). Then went to JJ's house to like play FM the whole day, it's fun, but a little embarrassed, because I stayed at his house for too long... But the result was not bad...we completed one whole season within 2 days! Lol...

Anyway, Tuesday had a tertiary meeting with Pst CK, the chapter of Psalms that Pst shared with us was great! After that went to eat dinner with Wei Siong and Kenny, then slack around by sitting at the side of the Singapore River...

Thursday cg...I played wrongly for the beginning of praise song...AHHHHHHHHHHHH...I WANT TO IMPROVE!!! lol...seriously, I really need to improve...

I hope there's another youth camp during the December holidays...lol.

One after service Sunday...

Hmm, this week was service week, so I went down to help out for recycling in the morning. Brought guitar along for guitar fellowship later with cg.

Today serving, thank God that the congregation were quite cooperative...haha. Helped to move chairs as usual after the service...

After serving, initially wanted to call Kenny and ask him where are they eating, but they came back just as I was about to call him...and we saw something interesting, an old uncle was performing stunts!!

He took a pen and balanced an umbrella on the tip of the pen, and furthermore, the umbrella was spinning on the pen!! LOL!!!

Went up to cafe with the cg, and then realise that all of us who brought guitar never bring any chords...no choice then, we only can play through memory...

Went into children church's room for the drummer and keyboardist thing...and I screwed up...ok, I'm nervous, and I don't have any confidence while playing it...sigh...nvm...it's over..haha.

Came out saw Tina and SK sitting at our table playing guitar also, so went and played and chatted with them also. The cg then left, Wei Siong came up, Sheng Hong came up also, Leon joined us also, in the end we were waiting for Cheryl...lol.

We then went to JP Mac for dinner. I tell you, that time, I think was the hardest laugh after so long...haha, never had such long laughs until you teared. Man, their friend, erm...don't know how to spell his name though...haha. He's funny. Haha. All of us went back about 10 plus...

Tina, Cheryl, Leon, Wei Siong and I took the train, as Cheryl said the bus is going to wait for very long...on the train to CCK, Wei Siong and I disturbed Cheryl abit, then chatted around. Haha.
Also chatted quite alot with Cheryl on the way home.

Came back home, I just realise I'm too tired and I just doze off on my table until 1 plus...then I went to bathe and came back to play games again...ok ok, enough of games, I think it's time to reduce game playing...ahh...

Whew...

Went to helped out at the Lantern Festival just now...man, I was so stressed.......

Haha...actually it was kind of last minute though...because this morning I was still sleeping...oops...anyway, Xiu Wen smsed me, I didn't manage to read and reply on time, until Wei Siong called me for quite some time then I 'managed' to wake up...haha. Well, I agreed though to go and help out though, even though I don't know what am I supposed to do there....

Went to Jarrett's house to play and slack around before going down to Gek Poh CC, when I met up with Wei Siong at Jarrett's house, then I know it was Cheryl who called us, which initially I thought it was Xiu Wen...haha.

Well anyway, the stress part is the games and changing of discs....ahhhhh, I made mistakes!! But, I think really can't be blamed though...no one's at fault at this....I'm serious! Haha...maybe I really need to make the right choices next time..haha...

Well, everything's over, played around together with the rest with Pst's son, haha, funny. So fun to play with small children, because they'll really give you all those weird weird ideas which really make you laugh, but still will find them adorable. Haha..

Cabbed home with Cheryl, JJ and Jia Jun. I alighted first...haha...Went home, played games before I went to bathe, slept at 4 plus...lol..

Ok, that's all, I've got another post though...

I don't know what to say...

Have not been updating lately though, a lot of things happen to me lately...be it spiritual or family matters or any other things.

One thing I know is that, thorughout all these crisis, I've got to keep my faith in the Lord, keep seeking strength from Him, that's all I need to do...

Anyway, after all these incidents, I think I should have grown more mature in a sense, well, at least I hope so...haha.

Been slacking during the start of the holidays...past 2 weeks had been going out with cg members to have fun. :) Once was we went to watch this movie called '4bia', kind of lame, but some of the parts it did scared a few of us...haha. Last week went out with Kenny, Wen Shun, Wei Siong, Nicholas and Mabel to Mind's Cafe, then starbucks, then home. Haha, had lots of fun. :D

Been like quite few weeks since I played guitar for cg again, later on I'll be playing again, hope I don't get rusty... :P

Well, got to go, think I should be updating again...haha...

I'm falling...

Hmm, last week was the last week of morning pm, really had a good time praying though.

On thursday, stayed in church the whole day due to my ez link card going broke soon, so I had no choice but to stay, but thank God I still had Jia Jun and JJ's company and really play round with guitar and really fellowship around. Anyway, really gotta thank Jermain and Guo Dong for teaching me guitar. After that day then I realise, they are actually more funnier than I thought. Haha. Then I fell asleep, JJ and Jia Jun left a note on one of my chords...lol, and I forgot what Xiu Wen had asked me to do...Hui Ling and Guo Dong came to our cg for make-up cell, Guo Dong even played guitar for our cg. Haha.

Anyway, I don't know why for the past week I'm suddenly got crazy over the songs of this korean band again, even though they've disband for sometime, and it's been like 1 year since I listen to the songs again...lol. The band's name is called Baby Vox.

Well, I think you guys should be able to recognise the girl in the center, she's the girl in 'goong' and 'coffee prince'. Haha. Their songs were quite nice actually, even though I don't understand...haha.

Yesterday, I think I said something that I shouldn't even have said...why did I always let temper problem get the best of me...sigh...anyway, don't really have a good feeling of this incident. I think I'm really falling apart. What's gotten over me this few days...weird...Anyway, congrats to my cgl, Xiu Wen!!! From graduating from SOT!!! Woohoo!!

Haha, Chong said that there were two angels above our heads...haha..lol. Anyway, mug for my last paper, and it's over. Arrgh...

I'm really busy.

Okok, I've been busy last few weeks, so I can't really get to blog frequently. But here I am. Haha.

Hmm, let's start from FOP.

FOP was great. Reuben Morgan, Parachute Band, Rev. Mark Conner, wow, this time round was good!!!! I just enjoy myself so much on the two days! Woohoo. On second night, Chong bought Parachute Band's album, and Ben and I, thanks to Chong, we can take picture with Omega and his band. Woohoo. I think you all have seen this picture, but I just put for fun. Haha.

On Sunday, went to ECP to celebrate Gary and May's birthday. Had fun down there, and thanks to May's father blessing, we had free barbecue. Yeah. At the end, Nicholas, Wei Siong and me, we planned a sudden performance. Thanks to Jian Kun, we got new nicknames, we are "S.H.E."... Nicholas become 'Sei-li-la', Wei Siong become 'Hei-be', I become 'Umbrella'. Sigh... Everybody was laughing like mad. Well, at least it was worth it. Haha.

Last week cgm, was a prayer cg, but it was quite a big faith-step though...I played for the whole thing...Xiu Wen say the duration was like about 4 cgm...wow.

This week cgm, first time playing for both praise and worship. Learnt a new song today. Even though didn't play well, but I believe I will do better next time.

Anyway, hope I can blog more often these few weeks.

I want to be renewed.

Hmm, first thing up. Thank you guys for those who encouraged me on my tag box. Haha. Really appreciate it. :)

Anyway, after posting it, I had these reminders of Pastor's sermon, about how the devil come to kill, steal and destroy, about how the devil actually tempt us to do other things, and then when we actually fall under temptations and other stuffs, the devil will actually start to put in all those guilt and shame and whatever thoughts and feelings that can actually put you down and can destroy your life. Come to think of it, why did I fall into that in the first place. I didn't guard my heart well enough, I wasn't strong enough, because I didn't pray enough, that's why I didn't have the strength to defend myself against the devil, I'd been relying on my own physical strength all these while, and that explains why my life feels weird.

Well, Sunday, responded to the altar call that Pastor Derek hold, it's about people who actually want to focus back on Jesus once again, where they had actually 'walked' off track before. Pastor just laid hands on everyone who responded. It's a great thing. And I just hope that after this I can really focus on the Lord again.

Anyway, Sunday's serving usher was quite a challenge, but was fun too. I was asked to serve traffic 2. Which was sort of the important position among the whole traffic marshal. Traffic 2 had to look at 3 places. The gate, the road coming down from 2nd and 3rd storey carpark, the underground park. Ahh... Was quite stressed though, but then thank God I'm able to do it. Haha. Thanks Boon Xiong for giving me to learn. Haha.

Went to look for cg after that. I want to complain. MY CG MEMBERS BULLY ME....AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH... lol. They took stupid pictures when I doze off...so sad...*sob sob* I want to change....hehe joking joking... then went to IMM with Nicholas, Wen Shun, May, Kenny. Walked around, window shopping around. Haha. Was really really tired. After bathe, went to sleep at 1215am. WOW. It was sort of the earliest time I slept for...hmmm, I started poly. Haha.. Well, got to continue lessons. Sayonara...

It's Time.

I think for me now is seriously time to do some soul-searching, and truly REPENT. Yes. Repent. Be it it's for my school or in my spiritual life. Both, or should I just say everything.

Have not been talking much about what actually happened to me to anyone, so I might just as well share down here.

MY LIFE IS IN A TOTAL CHAOS NOW. AND I TRULY MEAN CHAOS...

Why. I don't know. Even though God is still blessing me with his grace and blessings, but it still seems that my life is still in total chaos. I'm not the same me I used to be. And the worst part was that I did not change for the better...

Instead I became worse.

I mean, sometimes things may just seems too late to change, but I just hope that whatever things that I tried to do, I'm still able to make it.

I think I should be totally 'awake' after being scolded by my mum. I mean, I know that sometimes it's my fault and sometimes not, but most of the times it still involves in what I actually do, so. Hmm. I don't know. Initially after being scolded by her, all my mind can only be filled with one thing. Not hatred, not anger.

DEATH. Yes. It's the thoughts of dying and leaving this world for good.

But. Thoughts of all the things that I can't bear to part with all just came into my mind on time, and my 'thoughts of crappy stuffs' also came on time, so as to neutralize the effects of all these death thoughts. Thank God for that.

Because, just now's situation was really severe until that I already had plans of writing my final words...and if things proceed on. Well, I'll be on the headline tomorrow, with my picture lying on the ground and a pool of blood around me, and you guys won't be seeing me blogging here...This is how serious this thing is.

But to change, easier to be said than done. I need God's strength and power and support, and I do hope I can get support from anyone around me. Just anyone that I know. To motivate me to move on. Because I know, things can't keep going on like this, and if this doesn't wake me up, doesn't make me really realise what and where's my mistake, I think even if I die, nobody would even care about me.

Well, I think that's enough. I better use the time on my assignments. Adios.

Jumbling up for the past few days...

Hmm, I know I've not been blogging for the past few days...Haha. Well, here I am.

Hmm, Sunday, did not serve as it was rest week for my team, other than Jason my leader is serving. Haha. Well, finally can seat with the cg again. Haha. Fellowship around. Then gathered together to JP and celebrated KST's birthday. Haha. On the bus 242 there's this group of people making a public noise pollution. Shall not elaborate further...

Monday nothing special. Tuesday nothing too. Yesterday nothing too.

Hmm, today. CG was great. My playing...sigh...don't want to say much. Anyway. I just want to thank my angel!!!!(Hope he/she reads this, haha) Others had one drink, I have 2!! Wah, my angel is 'zai' one ok. Haha. And, he/she is clever enough to use computer-typed letter to me. Ahh...how to guess...haha, well, that's the objective though...hmm, starting to suspect a few...but can't confirm...due to this short amount of time. Hmm...shall see...wahaha...

Something's wrong...

For the past 3 weeks, I've been making the same mistake...Arrgh...I need a breakthrough......

Whew...

Wow...yesterday's cgm, first time I played for cgm...wah...I was so nervous...arrgh...played praise for cg yesterday, even though got some parts I played 'Bm' wrongly, but thank God, everything went through smoothly. Wah...was afraid that I screwed up, but still thank God I made it. Ahaha...

Anyway, gotta thank Samuel, for sacrificing his lunch break with his classmates and friends just to coach and guide me about guitar, few hours before the cgm, and also thank Gary and Xiu Wen for helping me along my first time playing...ahaha...(I sound like I'm saying speech...lol.)

Said a wrong word during testimony yesterday...arrgh...I better go eat the whole dictionary up to improve my vocabulary...arrgh...haha...lol...

Anyway, gotta listen to class...

Compressing...

Sigh...I wanted to blog this yesterday, but I didn't really got the chance to, so...it's delayed till now...haha.

Anyway, Sunday had a great deliverance service with Pastor Mike, I want thank God for setting me free, and also the person that prayed for me. My manifestation is a bit...hmm, how should I put it...hmm, I'm serving, then I'm seating at the stairs during sermon. I remember when Pastor began to pray for the people, because I'm seating at the stairs, so it's rather hard for me to open my hands because it's squeezy. So, I just bowed my head down and started to pray in tongues. Suddenly, I just began to cry uncontrollably, tears just keep flowing down...I heard people around me were praying for me, but I just can't stop, then one person just came and prayed for me. Cried even more, but after everything, really felt better. I even compared last year's and this year's deliverance, last year was kept coughing, this year was kept crying. Hmm, God really moves in a different way. :) And furthermore, the whole cg really felt the presence of God, which was good!

After service, went down to B2 to help out a little in communion tray recycling, but then asked for leaving early because thought the cg was waiting for me upstairs at lobby. When I reached lobby, they were already at BL, so sad...never mind, so I waited for Hui Tong and went together. The both of us were actually blur enough to actually went to Marina Bay when the cg was actually Marina Square... -_-!!!

Celebrated Rachel aka Mrs Zhou's birthday. Haha. She was surprised though. Took pictures at the stairs of Marina, went to the rooftop of Esplanade, had LOTS of fun, and also learnt more about the second coming of Jesus, and sang and really like mad on the evening. HAHAHA.

Monday nothing special.

Tuesday, hmm, slept for only one hour..haha. Anyway, share something down here. Yesterday while I was praying, I can't believe it, plus worship, I prayed for 40 min. Haha. To be specific, I didn't prayed, it was quiet time more than praying. Prayed for awhile for God's presence to come, suddenly, I felt some force on my chest, I just suddenly fall, and just laid on my bed for awhile. Then I continued praying for awhile before I end. Wow. Will share it with the cg this Thursday.

After school had to do CIP, so no choice gotta stay, actually thought that was the end. I saw Cheryl and Samuel from SPCCC distributing magazines, so stayed and helped them. Treating as doing things and spreading the gospel for God, even though I'm tired, but heart of a servant, is to serve. So I served. Haha. Well, shall not say any further, nothing much to say. Just gotta catch up with homework.

It isn't so bad after all...

Well, I was thinking about the whole evening, actually, with my psp not around me, it may not be as bad as it seems, at least, I have one less game temptation around me, I can concentrate better...haha...still feeling abit sick now...

I feel so recharged.

Just got back from cgm, and to be specific, it's dinner...haha, because all of us were kind of hungry, so we all went to eat. So I decided to blog, since my mum's in the toilet, and so I might as well blog before my father turns off the modem. Anyway, really glad that Thursday I'm not excused from cg to help out in expo, because today's cgm was just simply AWESOME!!

Xiu Wen say the message was to prepare us for Dr. Mike Connell's services this weekend. Indeed it was a great message. It's about dealing with emotional wounds and inner vows. Quite a number of it seems to match with my life...

After the message, Xiu Wen told everyone that the only way to release ourselves from all these is to forgive those that have hurt us. Well, the only person I just cannot seem to forgive is my father...I just don't know why, seems like I did last year, but this year, it came back again...well, so I lifted up my hands.

When Xiu Wen was going around praying, and while I was singing the song at the chorus part, tears just begin to flow uncontrollably. When Xiu Wen came to pray for me, she put one hand at the back of my neck, immediately I felt something like electric current flow through me, then when she started to pray for me, I started to weep again, the thing is when she place her hand on my forehead, few seconds later my whole body get numb!! And this lasted even Xiu Wen had finished praying for me. Wow. Power and love of God. I just feel so recharged...

But this morning a thing made me felt sad. I'm that kind of person that in the morning that when I woke up I can't find the things I want, I'll get grumpy. Well, I can't find my psp anywhere. I didn't kept it anywhere, I dozed off while playing, so I can't be the one who kept it. The problem now is, who would have taken it...it's just so ironic, yesterday I just made a decision to forgive, and now this kind of things happen. I mean, how am I suppose to forgive even though I know I'm suppose to forgive and I made the decision to forgive but now I just can't seem to forgive? (wow...long sentence..lol)

Arrgh... I just don't want to care so much now...all I know is I better look for something to eat and prepare to go to expo to help out...

Well, May tagged me yesterday, asked me to do this quiz...since I have nothing to blog about, might as well do this...lol.

Rules & Regulations of this quiz:
a) people who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any questions that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
b) tag 9 people to do this quiz & thos who are tagged cannot refuse.These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people

1)If your lover betrayed you, what would be your reaction?
answer: Hmm...just break up with that person peacefully, no point making a big fuss out of it...

2)If you had 3 wishes, what will that be?
answer: (1) To be able to serve in God's Kingdom forever and be a faithful servant! :D
(2) To get my family to know God and get them saved.
(3) Improve in my music abilities...

3)To be a singer or an actor/actress?
answer: I don't mind being actor, just that I don't like memorising tai-ci, cos I have STM...singer...hmm, just improve in my singing techniques bah...haha

4)Are you afraid of what lies ahead of you?
answer: Well, I'm actually a little like 'happy-go-lucky type...but, still will be afraid and wonder at times, whatever it is, Everything is gonna be alright!

5)Would you change yourself for the person you love?
answer: I would only change for the better, if I were told to change to accomodate that person, I would only change for those that benefits the both of us, other than that I think is unnecessary.

6)Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
answer: Of course is to love someone. Haha, seeing them having a smile on the face makes my day.

7)How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
answer: I don't mind waiting, if that person is really the one I can spent my life with...

8)If the person you secretly liked is already attached, what would you do?
answer: of course wish her all the best...I don't want to be the third person in another couple's relationship...

9)Is there anything that made you unhappy these days?
answer: Erm...don't really remember, and don't want to remember, unhappy things I rather choose to forget than remember...

10)Do you get butterflies in your stomach whenever you're around the guy/girl you like?
answer: Of course I do! But it seems like I'm not really that good in hiding, sometimes it's just too obvious even though I try to hide...

11)Have you ever not been able to get someone out of your head?
answer: Hmm...yes.

12)Who are currently the MOST important people to you?
answer: Of course is my family, my Daddy God, and W143. :)

13)Do you like studying?
answer: NO WAY! But...bo bian...still must do it... sigh...

14)Are you happy with your life?
answer: Quite. With God I'm already happy. (but without study would be the best...lol, I'm just joking. :P)

15)Would you give all in a relationship?
answer: Well...I'm quite a goondoo in these things, what's give all?? Well, I think I pick yes bah...

16)If you fall in love with 2 persons simultaneously, who would you pick?the lousiest one?OR the better one?
answer: erm...if I fall in love with 2 persons simultaneously, means I'm fickle-minded...I'd rather not choose one...

17)fill in the blank.__________ makes people in relationship difficult to handle but it also makes it beautiful.
answer: Blurness... :P

18)Do you often wish there was something you could change?
answer: Of course...but...what's over is over, and I know that whatever had happened happens for a reason, so might as well accept it.

19)What do you notice when you first meet a guy/girl?
answer: erm...the answer is kind of practical though...the looks...

20)DO YOU LIKE THE OWNER OF http://www.just-the-b3ginning--maymay.blogspot.com/?answer: ZZZ...erm...yes? lol.

My question:21)If you win the lottery of 4 million dollars, what are the 3 ways that you will spent the money?
answer: (1)Give tithe
(2)Take out 1/4, keep the rest in bank.
(3)Spent that 1/4, at the same time bless people around me.

THE FINAL 9 THAT i HANDPICKED TO TAG.(order is random. Lol.)
1)Oliverchan
2)Jason Jiang
3)Serene Pok
4)Victoria
5)Shella
6)Jason Ng
7)Jason Chong
8)Yong Jing
9)Wei Liang

Compresssing all...

Hmm, going to blog all the way from last week's cgm to Sunday's usher outing.

Hmm, Thursday's cgm was great. Before it had a small pm with Xiu Wen, Gary, Wei Siong and Jarrett. God has some encouragement words to speak to us. So Xiu Wen became the intercessor, and I really do felt encouraged after that. I'm going to do great things for God!! The word was great too. It's about finding a true friend. It's really a great message. Haha. After the cgm, we went to Gek Poh to have our dinner and to fellowship. After that all went home. Haha.

Friday, actually nothing much...haha. Went to Ben's house to practice for the performance on Serene's birthday, then fellowship awhile before I went back home.

Saturday, early in the morning, we have the 12 disciples bs! It's great! It's really interesting. The sad thing is...yes...I doze off in the beginning again...But at least I managed to get some important parts in the beginning...haha..Then went to East Coast Park to celebrate Wen Shun's birthday. Haha. Had lots of fun there. After that we all went to the chalet to look for Serene. The food was simply yummy!! Especially the mushroom!! Shella and I agreed on this! Lol. Anyway, we really had fun there. Ben and I even performed for Serene. Omg...so embarrassed...Because in the first place, we thought the whole crowd will be watching us perform, but it's only the 3 cgs...haha. After we finished performing, I forgot who told us that even the strangers from other units clap hands...lol...After that cabbed home with Pei Fen, Wei Qiang and Ben. Haha.

Sunday!! It's my first time serving officially!!(Not including training times) And really thank God, really really made a lot of new friends in usher, and trust me, there's more to come. Lol. Wore long sleeved shirt...and I was supposed to serve external traffic!! AHHH... If I hadn't wear that shirt, serving would be much more better...lol. Anyway, initially was thinking of joining cg for fellowship for awhile before I go back to the reception counter at church at 445pm, but they went to JP, and my ez-link card seriously got no money left, so I've got no choice, I had to leave...sigh...went with Ben and Joshua up to 4th floor to fellowship. Kathryn then came and return me the bible I'd lend her in the morning. Then the ushers all just fellowshipped around till 445pm. Haha. Took the chartered bus to Paya Lebar, at a condo's function room. Had games and food and fellowshipped there. Of course, photos!!...erm...I don't know where are all the photos though...haha... Anyway, went off last with Ng and the rest, Jasmine, Bernard, Boon Siong, Ivory(I hope I never spell wrongly...lol) and Hui Ling. Went to SingPost to fellowship. We asked each other a lot of thinking IQ questions...heehee. Be prepared to be asked by me...lol. Well, gotta start school soon, after having extra 4 days holidays due to exams...haha. *yawn* sleep...lol.

God's Grace!!

Arrgh, actually I planned to blog this on 24th...heehee, someone should know what I want to do. Haha, I just want to wish Kathryn Diane Happy Birthday!! But...it's already 25th...it's over...sob sob...lol. Haha.

Well, want to blog about exams on tuesday actually. I can't believe I actually woke up at 11am this morning, when my exams literally starts at 12pm!! Furthermore, I left house at 1115am!! I can't believe I managed to reach SP and the exam hall on 12pm! On the dot!!

But...but...I'm really worried about my tests right now...but, nevertheless, I shall have faith in my heavenly Father. =)

When on the train to JE in the morning, I then realise there's meeting at RW in the evening... -_-
Arrgh...bad memory, sigh...anyway, had a good time during the meeting. Somemore Xiu Wen, Wei Siong, Kenny and me were supposed to like discussed about some matters we discussed with Pastor, but Kenny and I had exams the next day, so Xiu Wen rather us go back and study. Thanks!! :)

Well, still have not finished my assignment yet...which was already late on due...arrgh, and I still got to study for maths!! Arrghhh!! God, I need your strength...

Rush And Rush And Rush......

ARRGHHH!!!! It's Monday Already!!! I still have not finished my assignment and have not even studied much!!! ARRGHHHH!!! (You all must be thinking, haven't finish assignment and haven't study, still dare to blog...ahhh, just let me blog for awhile...hahaha)

Well, yesterday, Pastor Kong shared a great message about servanthood again. Today there's a sermon outline in the bulletin! Pastor Kong said last time there's a sermon outline was last year!! Haha.

1) The Value Of Invisible Service.
2) The Value Of Individual People.
3) The Value Of Insignificant Gifts.

Joined Kelicia, Kathryn, Rachel and Nicholas for CIC 1st lesson, because I missed it last year though...hahahaha...Pastor CK gave the 1st lesson, and I just love to listen to Pastor CK when he speaks...but, the spirit is willing, the flesh is weak..haha.. I kept dozing off...but, can't blame me... Imagine yourself trying to sleep at 3. You were coughing all the way to 5 plus...you can sleep ah? I can't man...sigh...

After CIC class, we headed down to IMM, Kelicia went home. We then went down to join the cg for celebration of Kathryn's advance birthday. Haha! The cg bought the jellies to replace the cake, and they arranged 16 to be placed on the plate. Haha. Well, at least jellies are not as filling as the cake, as there will be alot of us to finish the jellies though..haha. Went to 'Spaghetti Too' to eat, hmm, the food, is not bad, an the price are actually much more reasonable than pastamania...haha. We then fellowshipped there, asking questions and stuffs, then we all went home. Yesterday did a 'faith-stretching' thing...I tried to endure my stomachache all the way from church to IMM to go home!!! And thank God...I did it...LOL...

OK, enough of the talking...back to work...byee...

I'm in danger...

OMG...The holidays are ending in 2 days time, and I haven't even completed my own assignments yet...and worse still, I haven't even started studying for my tests!! ARRGHH!!!!

Anyway, yesterday's cg was GREAT! There was a cg attendance of 16 yesterday!! Praise the Lord!! Hmm, listing out the people: Xiu Wen, Gary, Jarrett, May, Kathryn, Hui Tong, Wei Siong, Kenny, Wen Shun, Rachel, Shi Ting, Nicholas, Gina, Siyuan, Jarrett's cousin Ken and me...wow... After cg fellowship was FUN!! Haha...Rachel played the piano, Wen Shun and the rest down there singing, haha, Rachel is pro man...haha...Kathryn also another one. Grade 6...Canon in D...Haha... Well, like I said, my cg is all music talented...can sing, or play instruments...lol

Today went to morning pm. Today was even better, I didn't know I was already praying overtime where I'm still like in the first half of the prayer list, and then the worship leader came up and lead the whole church in a worship song... After pm, Gary, Wei Siong, JJ, May, Kathryn and me went to eat breakfast. Today was blessed by JJ for taxi!! Again! Haha, thanks bro!! Heehee, he blessed me like quite a few times already..haha..

Ahh...

Ok, just to sum up what's been happening for the past 2 days.

Yesterday morning went to join the SOT students to pray together for 1 hour. It was great, amazingly, 1 hour passes so fast! And I didn't even get to sleep at all...Seriously, for 1 whole day no sleep...went to join cg for breakfast, JJ, Sheng Hong and 2 girls(don't know who they are...) were there also, then all went home. So I went to banquet to look for W116 and Chun Li.

Accompanied Vic to NP to buy her degree books, helped her carry also, then she 'lend' me money to buy food, because I had none...gotta pay her back still...wahaha...-_- Then I went to Ben's house to play guitar...then I slept at his house for about 2 hours...lol, seriously too tired...Then met up with mum at Lot 1 to eat 'New York New York'. Hmm, the food not bad..haha, quite nice though..lol

Today, was supposed to go for the morning pm, but........

I overslept... -_-!!!

Ok, partly is my fault, because I never set the alarm, but then again, I'm seriously too tired, so I was sleeping all the way...but, thank God, He woke me up on time. Haha. Testimony. I'm able to make it for a ceremony in school which I was supposed to attend. Well, reach there about 945, just in time to make it. It was about our school having this partnership with this hotel and resorts management for like teaching our students the IT stuffs for Hospitality and Tourism. Well, was a little boring listening to all the talks. But the buffet was great! Haha, the food is nice...(I feel as if I'm so kian png...)

Well, that's all, reply tags...

YuenLeng : I also want to, but it's like I can't reach her also la, not online, sms her nvr reply...sigh, u same class with her what, u can try also...wahaha
MEIQI : YOYO!! LOL!
Guardian Angel : Sorry ah, I got STM...who are you huh?
Joseph : What you talking in the tag? what so manyy hws1? lol!

Short post

Ok, last 2 days been sleeping like a pig though...haha, play too much I guess, but I can't play anymore!!! There's an assignment for my web publishing and I've not even started yet!! OMG!!! Gotta rush for it...

Anyway, Father's day service was great! The drama was soooooooooo funny!! hahaha!! Sunday I've graduated from usher training!! Lol! And my cg ps-ed me and went to LJS...HAHA! JUST JOKING! LOL! I went to look for them with Chong, Ben, Wei Liang and Verona..haha. Anyway, Gary brought a friend Mabel, and I read from May's blog, Nicholas and Mabel responded!! Praise the Lord! Our perserverance has finally led to Nicholas's salvation!! Really have more burden in my friends' salvation...P.U.S.H.

Was talking to Ben on the bus on sunday, and he told me something that I've done which in the first place I should not even have did it. Well, so, I guess I owe everyone an apology... For those of you who know what am I trying to say here, I just want to say I'm sorry, even though this may not be able to cover up the damage I've done, but I really want to apologise... And for those who don't understand what's going on here, well, don't bother asking me, I won't say anything...

Well, gotta rush off for my assignment...arrgh, I've still got other modules to study for my mid-sem exams!!! ARRGHHH!!!!!!

P.S. Well, my previous post seems as if I'm writing a compo...lol

YOUTH CAMP!!!!!!

I'm back from youth camp~!!! I can't believe it, 3 days, it just went so fast, I just can't get enough of it, and the times where I can really experience encounters with God again! Furthermore, I just finished my 'dinner', because I just dozed off at around 5 and I woke up at 1237 at midnight...wow...from the day before the first day of camp, I slept 2 hours, first day, 2 hours, second day 3 hours, altogether I'd only slept for 7 hours in 3 days?! My God, I really want to thank God for His strength upon all of us even though we were so tired. Anyway, I just want to say something about the camp: Tired...but fun! Amazing! Awesome! Great! Wonderful! Fantastic! ... ... Ok, my vocab wasn't very good though, these are the words I can think of for now, but I think you know how much I really enjoyed myself in this camp now right...haha. So now, I just want to type about what happened bout me during this 3 day camp, it's gonna be long...haha.

Day 1: Reported at PHS at 830am...initially was supposed to report at 8am, but something happened, which is a testimony though. 630am, I was done with everything, but, I was looking for my specs...I seem to have misplaced it somewhere, I started to panic, I just went around my whole house looking for it, but I just can't seem to find it anywhere...7am, I went into my room and started praying to God about helping me to look for my specs. After I finished praying, Jermain smsed me, he asked all the sound crew members to print out the schedule of the duties we are supposed to do in camp, well, thank God for that, I'm able to print for Wei Siong and Sheng Hong also, but the main thing that's so amazing was that, I found my specs was actually at my desktop printer! Camouflaging with my earpiece! Really want to thank God for that, the sms came so timely, and thank God, I'm able to finish the printing and everything fast enough and rushed out immediately, and I'm actually supposed to meet Kenny at CCK, but due to this, I missed meeting up with him, but it's sort of worth it though..haha..

Reached PHS, it was drizzling, I start to walk fast, and thank God, not long after I settled down, it start to rain heavily...but through the prayers of the leaders, the rain stopped. Praise God! I just can't seem to settle down..haha, I'm just so so excited about this camp, be it whether is it doing my job as a mentor or a sound crew member, I'm just running about everywhere I go...Wei Siong can testify for that...haha... Well, I didn't really get to fellowship with the rest of my cg members other than Wei Siong, and occasionally, with Gary, Wen Shun and Kenny. Moving the speakers, sound console, mics and wires up and down all the way from the seminar room to parade square to hall and back to seminar room again and... well, if you are involved in the camp, you would actually see the sound crew members running like mad in between sessions...haha. During telematch, helped JJ and his team about the game at his station, peeling garlics and onions, squeezing lime juice into the basin of water...haha, it was fun! Anyway, Leslie and I skipped a meal...AHHHH...Haha, it's worth it, because I'm serving God at that time! Erm...looking after the sound console...hahahaha...

After games, the campers have half an hour to wash up, leaders and sound crew members all went up to the seminar room again for a screening of the video 'Indescribable'. THIS VIDEO IS JUST SIMPLY AMAZING. I can't stop thinking about what the preacher in this video has shared and the pictures that he has showned. This is one of it.

This is a picture I got from wikipedia, this is actually about the centre core of the black hole from the whirlpool galaxy in the universe, 31 million light years away and this pic is actually taken by the hubble telescope. Look at this, right now, all I know that my Lord and Saviour Jesus is real! I'M JUST SO IMPACTED BY THIS VIDEO!!!!!!

After the screening, we were moving all the equipments back to hall again for the session missions night, I forgot about one of the sessions...STM... Anyway, the game 'Left Behind', it's just amazing, the games team really did a great job about this. *Clap Clap* Wei Siong and I went to off the lights to stir the atmosphere up. It was seriously very good. The end of the video actually shows about rapture coming, which happens during the second coming of Christ, all who are righteous in the Lord shall all be sent directly up to heaven to meet with the Lord, leaving a group of people here on Earth who will go through trials and tribulations from the anti-christ before going up to heaven. It shows that a preacher is in the church preaching to the whole congregation, then suddenly, thunder strike and the bible the preacher is holding just dropped onto the floor with a loud bang, and 98% of the people in the church were gone, leaving only about less than 18 people looking shocked, and despair, at the end it show a guy covering his face with both his hands and kneeling on the ground. The video then show the 10 commandments of this game, then it shows this sentence "Prepare for Hell", "Mentors take over now"...When groups of 5 began to went out of the seminar room, we can hear screamings from the outside. When it was our turn, Rachel, Hui Tong, Jarrett, Wei Siong and me were in a group. Ok, it got me in one room, where it shows that we left our friends and families back down here on Earth to suffer, and it was already too late to bring them up to heaven, and their hearts were all filled with hatred towards us. This actually makes me feel even more burden for my family and my friends, even more wanting to bring them to Christ, because I really don't want to see them being tortured, especially my beloved family... Anyway, the golden rule of the game, 'Keep silent at all times'...

We then all gathered back at the seminar room, to share and stuff, Pastor then started sharing the power of the cross, we then started praying, people started to manifest, we all lingered in the presence of God for very long, started at around 11 plus, we didn't even know that it was already 1 plus am in the morning, wow, time really passes very fast when we are in the presence of God. Wei Siong saw the light of God, and I felt a touch on my shoulder from God, it's just like a pat on the back of encouragement, felt so good.. All of us then proceed to bathe and stuff, the group of us, Gary, Kenny, Wen Shun, Jarrett, Wei Siong and me slept quite late...

Day 2: Wei Siong and I woke up at 7...ahh, we thought we were going to be late, but who knows, when we went to the toilet to brush our teeth and do some wash-up, we saw Jermain in the toilet...seems like he just woke up...haha, can't blame him also, he has more things to do compared to us...well, thank God we were still able to set up everything right on time for the morning PT. Whew! We then went to have our breakfast before proceeding up to seminar room for morning devotion. Well, I know this is very ironic, we were supposed to do our own prayer, but Wei Siong and I fell asleep...but ironically, I can still hear the music playing while sleeping...Wei Siong says this is the peace of God, God wants us to take some rest...ahh, I don't know...hahaha...

After that, the whole camp were then split into to 3 teams, men, women and mentors, initially I'm not sure whether am I supposed to be in the mentors team, but then Sheng Hong needs people to be at the men's room, so Wei Siong and I just went there...I just felt so tired...kept dozing off...ahhhhh... Dev was preaching about manhood, and I actually learnt something from there..wonder what Pastor shared with the mentors...hmm...

We then went down to have our lunch, some incident happened down here, there were not enough food, but from here, I really see the spirit of excellence and see how the leaders really react quickly to situations like this. Brother Kee Liang actually went out, took $150 and went to the nearest hawker centre to buy food for the whole camp, and the leaders actually were the last to eat, some didn't eat at all, and the some mentors actually sacrificed to let the team eat first before they eat, which mades me feel a little guilty, because I went down to eat...haha...

Ahh, I forgot what happened after lunch...STM...We then had our 1st evangelistic meeting in the camp for the secondary school students, we had a drama done by our leaders and some staffs. Mayce even got injured for the drama...big sacrifice!

Well, anyway, we watched the video of the 'How Great Is Our God" tour part 2 during the evangelistic meeting for the tertiary students. This is even more impacting. In the milky way galaxy, there were so many stars that were actually few million, billion, thrillion and quadrillion times bigger than the size of Earth. After he shared about the stars, he then shared about a protein in our body. Pastor Tan had also shared this before, just that I forgot the name of it... The name of the protein is called laminin. It actually holds our whole body together. This is the picture of laminin.

Can you believe it? This protein in our body is actually in a shape of the cross of Jesus! And this actually holds our whole body together! Read this verse from Colossians 1:16-17(NIV). "For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together." I'm totally so impacted after watching this 2 videos. I'm just so speechless. God is just so awesome. After the meeting, sound crew stayed behind to do the keeping of the equipments, then Wei Siong went down first, and I stayed behind for the briefing for mentors with Pastor CK, had fun too. I then went down to have my dinner. Pineapple rice from the buffet!! Lol! It was nice, yummy! I then start to fellowship with my members, we even played a lot of games. We played animal kingdom at the canteen, we then went to play basketball with 2 other person that we don't know. After that, we went to bathe. Xiu Wen then opened a door for us to like fellowship inside. Xiu Wen is also sacrificing a lot, she did not sleep just to finish reading the book for her SOT, she can't even sing properly due to lack of sleep, and she even had gastric...Dear Lord, I just pray the You will give her strength to carry on to do her assignments, I also pray for healing upon her so that her gastric will be healed. Amen.

Slept at 4 plus in the morning. Really getting tired...

Day 3: Was actually supposed to wake up at 650am, but all of us were just so tired, we actually woke up at 740am in the morning, totally missed the morning PT. May called some of us, but we didn't heard our phone ringing...*yawn*

After washing up, Wei Siong and I immediately went to seminar room to help out. A while later, Jermain came up with packets of food in his hands. He brought food up for us! Thanks a lot! Even though it's just a packet of bee hoon, it's filling enough for our stomach. Started to set up everything and morning devotion starts. Pastor was sharing with us something, but the spirit is willing, the flesh is weak, I just keep dozing off...arrgh...then, at one point of time, I saw many people walking up, I was wondering what are they going up for, I saw Leslie up there, Chun Li and Sherrill up there also, so I roughly guessed that all the mentors are going up, so I just went up there also. When I went up then I realise, Pastor wanted to lay hands on all of us. When it was my turn, all Pastor did was put his hands on my shoulders, and I just started trembling non-stop. When I fall, I'm still trembling. The power of God is indeed great. (actually while typing this, my hands are trembling again...don't know why...haha) When I stood up, Pastor challenged us to take a step of faith to go and pray for rest of the people in the room, believing that we also have the power to make other people fall under the power of God. Well, I went to prayed for Wei Siong, I just prayed for him by faith... And then I went to the other side and I went to catch Rachel, then I walk around to see whether is there other people that needs help or have not been prayed for, well seems like all are done...After that, we were told to get back to our rooms to do the final cleaning up. We then went to take our bags to put into a classroom before going back to seminar room for the final meeting. My cg even took pictures, but Kenny wasn't there...what a waste...

The whole camp then went to hall to take pictures, and the different houses also took pictures. Wei Siong, Gary, Jarrett, Leslie and I stayed back to help Sheng Hong and Jermain to help shift things to the van. Went back with the cg at around 3 plus. Anyway, thank God for His reminder of my pail still left in PHS, if not, my grandmother sure scold me...haha...

Anyway, the leaders really did a good job in planning this whole camp and making it so successful! *CLAP CLAP CLAP* And I'm glad that I learnt a lot of things in this camp, get to know more people and talk to them in this camp, people like Sheng Hong, Jermain, Dev, Guo Dong, Leslie...last but not least, my Father God!! For the encounters with Him and touched by Him. Heehee, Sheng Hong is a guitar pro, one more person for guitar consulting...haha..

Just now when I woke up, I was actually wondering why Pastor placed his hands on my shoulder, then I realised I sort of got injured while shifting the speakers and stuffs, and my shoulders were actually aching and hurting if I move too much, after thinking this, I tried to move my hands, no pain and aches anymore!!!! Praise the Lord!!

Well, it's really getting early now, I really need to sleep...*yawn~*

Unfruitfulness brings demotion...

Ok, I know the title sounds kind of serious though...anyway, just want to blog about this though...

Today after usher, saw Xiu Wen talking to Jarrett, Gary, Hui Tong, Wei Siong. I guess it was maybe about some cgcs thing, so I went in, and I went in and found out that all 5 of us had been demoted...ok, sounds kind of sudden to some people, but to me, it wasn't...I expected it...just didn't know that it would come so soon...

Actually, reflecting about myself, I seriously never done much, ever since I became a cgc, I didn't really do much to be honest. A few times is I really don't know how to handle certain stuffs, the rest is I never really help out, yes I do, but not much...not much......

Saying that after hearing this I'm not sad at all is seriously talking nonsense, of course I'm sad, I'm still a normal human right, humans do have feelings, if I feel nothing after this, I can go die...but, have to move on though, after all, not being a cgc doesn't mean that you can't serve God right? You can help out in ministry, help out in cg in various ways you can, do other things other than holding a title and do nothing much...I was actually thinking and reflecting upon myself when I was on the LRT, what are the things that I should have do but not done yet...And I also have this thinking... Anyway, I'm not beaten down so easily...I will stand up and move on...

Maybe I'm not really suitable to become a leader in any areas for the time being...either I screw up or other issues, or maybe I'm just suitable to be following in the lead of others after all...well, I don't know, time will tell, and God will lead me...

Went to cut my hair to super short yesterday, didn't really expect my cg members to say that I look good in this haircut...hmm, haha, I was just expecting them to say I got another haircut again...lol...

Ok, I just want to really do reflecting...I don't know what seriously went wrong with me and my life...am I really taking things for granted? or am I just not good enough...I really don't know...seems like there's intense spiritual warfare tonight...

Weird Dream

Ok, I slept till 2 plus just now...cos I slept at 6 plus in the morning...I was playing psp...lol...Well, that's not the point...

I had this weird dream during this long period of sleep...I dreamt that this friend of mine, jumped down a window from a building and died, and I was in the room with this person, watching this person just climbed out of the window and jumped, while I stood down there doing nothing to stop him... (Before I continue, my friends out there please don't be scared, I can assure you that the person I dreamt of is not one of you out there, but instead, I didn't even see this person before, but in my dreams I just seem to know this person...)

Ok, back, then I just peeped out of the window and I saw that person laid on the ground, motionless, with blood around him...and I just broke into despair... then, people come around and comfort me and then I woke up...

Well, this has led me into a thinking. People, treasure those that are around you, please don't take them for granted, at times other people may have done things for us and we are grateful to them, but when time goes by, we just take them for granted. Things should not go on like this, we never know what's going to happen the next day, so learn to love those that are around you, even your enemies!

Lol, when did I became so sentimental... :P

My time management needs to be better!

It seems like my time management is DECLINING... I'm late for last Sunday's service, bs, Saturday cgm at the church...sigh... Why... I really need better time management, and also need to re-think about everything...

Had my first usher training yesterday...I can't believe it, it's not because that I met these kind of person, and not because I've never met such kind of person before, well, it's just...

Sigh, forget it...I just can't believe there's such bossy and unreasonable people around...ducks...but, I'm amazed that I can already answer that person nicely and with a SMILE somemore...lol, and thanks Ng for helping me also! Anyway, because ushers can't really sit with their cg, I kind of miss them...lol. I happened to sit beside one lady while serving, and she said something to me which really encourages me. She said, 'Thanks for serving!' I mean, this may sound simple and meaningless to you, but to a person who is serving, this is really a form of encouragement, right.

Well, went to eat with Kenny, Wen Shun, May and Siyuan after the service, went to JP to eat LJS...lol, we then went to Marina Square, Kenny wants to buy his slippers, but there isn't the size that suits him, he's kind of sad though, Siyuan was supposed to be looking at her winter clothes, but we didn't look at any in the end...lol.

Pics taken yesterday

This are some of the pics taken yesterday, it's only three though, some are still with Jung Mun though, I'll get from him someday! lol!

Woo! The handsome Korean dude with me! Lol!

Making funny faces!!

Best pals 4eva!!

Jung Mun, we'll remember you!!

Last gathering with Jung Mun

Yesterday night, after bs, went to Lau Pa Sat to meet the rest to gather together with Jung Mun, they were eating there, I did not eat because I had bs...but the lesson was good also, just that I missed the first part of it because I fell asleep at home and I overslept...

We went to the side of the Singapore River, and we like celebrated a small farewell party for him. We took pictures with him, he look like a star!! Lol! He also sang us a song, a children song in Korean, which is about the 3 bears, and the other one is about him asking the rabbit where is he going if I never remember wrongly...haha

We like do alot of stupid stuffs...haha, just to like have a happy memory before Jung Mun returns to Korea, and one thing that kind of shocked me when I managed to do it. Ben and I alighted at JE, but I didn't expect that he'll actually went back into the train, which shocked me also, and thank God, I managed to jump back into the train, haha...See, being small-sized also has its own good points ok, see, jump into the train when the door is like so close to closing...lol, had an experience though...lol

Anyway, Jung Mun should be still on his way back while I'm blogging this...and due to my computer problem(I hate my laptop! Free ones are just so lousy!!), I signed in to MSN, and I saw Jung Mun adding me, but my whole computer hanged!!! I restarted the com, and when I re-log in, the window is gone!! I tried to use my memory to remember the email of his, and I tried to add, hope it's correct...

Arrgh, later got al lot of tests and mock test...arrgh, after vacation got major test...got to work even harder...

Meeting at YMCA

Initially this meeting was supposed to be at Riverwalk, but it was being changed to YMCA, I didn't ask the reason why...haha

Was a great meeting. Xiu Wen was finally back to lead P&W...haha. Pastor talked about 2 Chronicles, about how powerful fellowshipping is. We then talked about a lot of acronyms, about what we should do as mentors in the camp. Below are the points.

A.L.E.R.T.

C.O.D.E.R.E.D

P.R.O.

3Ps

From mentors to senior mentors we need time, trust, sharing and dialogue/communication.

We then talked about the schedules and stuffs about the camp. Brother Kenneth then briefed us about who is in charged of what...haha, Pastor also joked a lot, everyone was laughing. Lol.

After the meeting, the CGLs need to stay in the room for meeting, I was waiting for Xiu Wen though, and glad I did. Dorothea came out with her, which I didn't expect that, well, she has lessons though...haha. Anyway, went back on the MRT with Xiu Wen, was initially supposed to be talking to her, lol, even though she was doing the talking along the way, but really learn a lot. She really has high hopes on me, which of course, I don't want to disappoint her, I want to do my best for the Kingdom of God!!

Anyway, had quite a number of mock tests on Wed and Thurs, which I'm still not sleeping yet...lol, I don't like Java!! lol...

Compilation

Ok, just going to compile what happened on Saturday and Sunday...

Saturday, after I went back from Ben's house, changed and just prepare for his call to meet him up on the bus. We went to Peninsular Shopping Centre with Chong and Ng, as Chong and Ng wants to buy acoustic guitars. Sigh, we went to Davis and Maestro, ahhhh, I want an acoustic guitar!!! Lol...

We went to SMU basement to play guitars...but, we were being complained by the students there...We were too noisy, Ng says because our strumming are not synchronized, and our singing were sort of...hmm, too loud? I don't know...sigh... We then rush to pm, thank God we made it...haha, as we ran after 179 when we were at BL...

After pm, went to JP to eat at Subway with W116, and Ng treated me...thanks Bro!! :) Was quite tired though...

Sunday, was late for service, as I went to meet up Siyuan, was talking to her along the way, and sharing also. We reached there VERY late... Ok, Pastor Tan preached a very good message also, and he hold an altar call for those who wants or have a desire to be a leader in the future. Gary went up, Jarrett went up, I went up. Pastor Aries prayed for me, but this time round, maybe because of there's too many people, the moment we fall, in less than 3 mins, we were being called to stand up...

After debrief, the three of us were being asked to talk with Xiu Wen, which I also think what she say was quite true, if you truly want to be a leader, you'll have to show the desire and the enthusiasm that you really want to be one. The three of us were sort of hesitating and undecisive when we went up.

After that we went to JP to eat ourselves as Xiu Wen had to go meet pastor to discuss about the youth camp stuffs, and it was very long though... we had quite a good time fellowshipping there...
Went back home, was so tired anyway...

Later going to Riverwalk for meeting...

Year of Promotion

I'm seriously starting to think, this year shall be a year of promotion and breakthrough for me. I've joined usher, going to do more things in this time round youth camp. I seriously have a sense that God is going to use me in a special way for this time round's youth camp, although I still don't know what is it. Anyway, was happy that I went to all meetings, was kind of doing something more for this time's youth camp though, Pastor says the people that went to Thursday's meeting, camp experience will be difference from the rest, other than leaders though...haha.

Friday, went to make up cell at Elaine's cgm, due to me headache on Mon...anyway, was great though, really have the burden for W143 again, and was also fun, and also had a new creation for worship songs, I'll go on to that later. Went to meet up with Xiu Wen and Gary at JP, then we went to meet Elaine, Ben and Ng at BL ctrl station. The cg msg was great today. :) We took pics with Jung Mun, and thank Verona for the refreshments! :) After so long, never see Xiu Wen, kind of miss her though(I mean it!!!), and I also have a feeling that I'm more closer to Gary nowadays, after all the talkings. :) New step!!

While at the bus stop at NTU, Ben and I created a new trend, you know worship songs right, we made it so groovy and hip-hop!! Lol! He sings, I beat-box!! Haha, don't blame us though, we were just kind of high though...lol...

Anyway, I'm having free music behind me while I was blogging, Ben's playing guitar, going out tomorrow with them, before proceeding to pm. So going to have fun now! Lol...


Anyway, this is a pic Xiu Wen took for Gary and me....We were involved in an accident...We are in need of witnessess!! Help us...lol

The Power of God

Tuesday meeting...just one word to describe.

Awesome.

You know what, this was actually the first time that I actually fall under the power of God. Woo! The experience was great! I know some of you out there must be thinking, fall under the power of God only what...

Hey, it was great ok, somemore it's my first time experience this thing. About the meeting just now I also got something to say.

I can't get enough of God.

Seriously, when you are just in the presence of God, you seriously can't get enough. Right now, I'm seriously can't get enough of God...

Went to MRT station with Xuelin, Serene, Chun Li, Wei Siong. Saw Tina and Xuan Hong at the platform. Went back with Tina, Xuan Hong and Wei Siong from Outram Park, as the rest is taking towards Dhoby Ghaut that side...

I just love God so much!!!!

Counting down to Youth Camp--21 days...

2 fellowships I want to share...

Well, I know there's something bad going in on in my life, but I shall not say it here...cos I said it was about the 2 fellowships I want to share right...

First, was the fellowship with Wei Siong at CCK kopitiam at the bus interchange, haha, thank God that his friend can't make it to meet up with him, so I had the chance to eat and talk with him...haha. We had quite a chat though, and had fun. haha, and as for the contents of our conversation, hmm, shall not say out...haha, cos it's quite confidential. lol.

As for yesterday, hmm, went to hospital to visit Shifu, and well, I was so dumb, that I actually go the one big round route...-_-, well anyway, thank God that I reached there on time for the shuttle bus, with Qi Hui and Verona... reached there, the rest are already there, Shifu was so pale...even though the time we come was a bit better, but she still looks quite sick to me...got to pray for her also. The rest says it's due to inflammation at the appendix, so that's why she was admitted to the hospital...had quite a fellowship with W116. From that I got something, my cg is really for the time to change, our cg lacks love... Even Wei Liang, who's in tekong throwing grenades, called back to Ben the moment he received the message that Shifu was admitted to hospital. This sounds a little funny, but this is call true care and concern...

I can say that I myself is not perfect, I'm not doing enough, but that doesn't give us the reason not to do anything, I was just talking with Xiu Wen, I told her maybe it's because our cg are all teenagers, so there's still a certain level of maturity we are not there yet, and furthermore, teenagers nowadays tend to care more about themselves than the people around them...I just thought of this only, this is not part of my blogging...Cheryl is about the same age as me, if she can do it to care the people around her more than herself, why can't I do it...seriously, I think this is the willingness of the heart and the mind...hmm, repent repent...

After everything, went to Ben's house to stay for the night, and this time round, we didn't just go there to have fun. It was fruitful this time. Why?

We were able to have a guitar fellowship, learnt quite a number of songs, only thing need to improve on is the changing of chords, when Chong came, was blessed with roti prata!! We then went up to have another guitar fellowship again, then we worshipped the Lord, prayed, and everything felt better... went back to his room, as we had guitar fellowship at his balcony.

Went in to play wrestling, haha, Chong and I tagged to whack Ben, but in the end he won, because we can't really figure out the keys of the game...der...then Chong was tired, so he slept first, Ben and I continued with Winning till 6 in the morning, then we went to sleep. Woke up at 10 plus, played wrestling again, then we went down to have lunch and went home...

Just now was tired, so I fell asleep, and woke up, Xiu Wen was already online...oops...cos I planned to like chit chat with her through msn since she don't like to talk on phone...

Anyway, got to stop here, want to practice guitar again...haha..

The meeting at Riverwalk

Yesterday, went to Riverwalk for CGLs and CGCs meeting with the Pastor, the whole thing ended late than I expected though, but it was fun...haha.

Bought 3 char siew bao, ate one, the rest gave it to Jarrett because he was hungry...haha, bless him. Lol...

Vic left at 730, she got appointment though... After praise and worship, Pastor then began to share with us some stuffs, stirring the revival in offices, campuses and stuffs, I was stirred up though, but being stirred up there is no use, we got to really go back out there into the marketplace to do something once again before we can really make a difference... Pastor then began to ask who already has a prayer group in their own campuses or offices, quite a lot went up, which really makes me got to think back, it's really time for me to do something, be it it's with Kenny, or looking for some other people who is the same as me, to really meet up and pray, to pray for a revival, the salvation of our classmates and friends, from a prayer group become a bible study group, and then into a cell group and etc...

After everything, Jarrett and Gary briefed us, which I think that they are actually speaking the truth, it's just that our spirit-man is just not sensitive enough, eg, if a group of only 10 plus people, their praise and worship can be so way louder, why can't our cg do it?
It's really the time to think and do something, which is what Xiu Wen told us before, unless we go out and look at other people's cg, we'll never know how much we are praising and worshiping...

Around 10 plus, the briefing for the youth camp starts, JJ was taking down the information, he took my whole foolscap paper...haha, he said he'll copy one for me though, thanks ah..haha

Anyway, initially I was thinking of staying back to try and see what can I take down to let Xiu Wen know, since she can't be there due to her chicken pox, although I was tempted to go home, but, the rest of them went home, as some of them still has examinations like Gary, and I'm not trying to boast here, but even though I have lessons at 8am, if I don't make the choice to stay, no one will be able to help the cg to take down, but still got to thank Xuelin also, she offered to help me tell Xiu Wen about the stuffs she need to know, thank you Xuelin. :)

While brother Kee Liang was talking, I was initially thinking, will I be given a job to do at the camp, at first it was Cheryl's cg members, JJ and the other guy doing, but in the end I was involved in the stage crew team too...haha, yeah, at least I got something to do in the camp already...haha. I'm so looking forward to this camp...woohoo!!!!!

After discussing outside, we went back into the auditorium to discuss with Pastor CK, then we helped to arrange back the chairs, then halfway, we were told to go back, as it was really quite late for the students, so, Cheryl, JJ and I took 190 home. It was that time then I know that Cheryl lived quite near to me, very near...haha, no wonder last year a few times when I was going home, keep having this feeling that there's someone in the church that lives quite near me...haha...

Had a little chat with Cheryl while walking back, then she gave me a pick when I told her mine broke, and misplaced Ng's pick...haha, thanks again ah Cheryl! :P

Anyway, got to listen to lessons already. I'll blog soon. :D